Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

After a day long bus tour, I went out for a drink. I sat on a bar and ordered a beer. A cold beer in the hot evening is the thing. People everywhere, happy people, holding hands, talking, laughing, people in love, kissing, the one admiring their children, playing with them, having fun, a lot of fun..
I sat there, with my beer and my cigarettes on the table.
To make the evening better, there was this blonde sunburned, quiet good looking guy, singing country music. "On the road again.. " was one of his songs...
But hey, noone of this wld`ve had any sense at all, if there wasn`t sitting two of my most favourite people in the world, right besides me.
Enjoy ur moments, folks.
The small ones!

:)

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

[SIZE="3"][FONT="Century Gothic"]This is a true story of Mother’s Sacrifice during the Japan Earthquake.
After the Earthquake had subsided, when the rescuers reached the ruins of a young woman’s house, they saw her dead body through the cracks. But her pose was somehow strange that she knelt on her knees like a person was worshiping; her body was leaning forward, and her two hands were supporting by an object. The collapsed house had crashed her back and her head.

With so many difficulties, the leader of the rescuer team put his hand through a narrow gap on the wall to reach the woman’s body. He was hoping that this woman could be still alive. However, the cold and stiff body told him that she had passed away for sure.
He and the rest of the team left this house and were going to search the next collapsed building. For some reasons, the team leader was driven by a compelling force to go back to the ruin house of the dead woman. Again, he knelt down and used his had through the narrow cracks to search the little space under the dead body. Suddenly, he screamed with excitement,” A child! There is a child! “
The whole team worked together; carefully they removed the piles of ruined objects around the dead woman. There was a 3 months old little boy wrapped in a flowery blanket under his mother’s dead body. Obviously, the woman had made an ultimate sacrifice for saving her son. When her house was falling, she used her body to make a cover to protect her son. The little boy was still sleeping peacefully when the team leader picked him up.
The medical doctor came quickly to exam the little boy. After he opened the blanket, he saw a cell phone inside the blanket. There was a text message on the screen. It said,” If you can survive, you must remember that I love you.” This cell phone was passing around from one hand to another. Every body that read the message wept. ” If you can survive, you must remember that I love you.” Such is the mother’s love for her child!![/FONT][/SIZE]

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

I was a freshman in high school, and one day I saw a kid from my class was walking home. It looked like he was carrying all his books. I thought to myself, why would anyone bring home all his books on a Friday? He must really be a nerd. I had planned a pretty good weekend (parties and a football game with my friends tomorrow afternoon), so I shrugged and walked on.

When I went there, I saw a bunch of kids running toward him. They ran at him, knocking all his books out of his hands and kicked his legs from under him so he landed in the dirt. He lost his glasses and I saw they landed about ten feet from him. He looked up and I saw this terrible sadness in his eyes. I felt really sorry for him, so I ran over to him.
... ... ...
... As he crawled around looking for his glasses, I saw tears in his eyes. When I handed him his glasses, I said, "Those guys are jerks. They should have had a beating!"
... ... ... ...
He looked at me and said, "Hey thanks!" It was a big smile on his face.

I helped him pick up his books, and asked him where he lived. It turned out he lived near me so I asked him why I had not seen him before. He said he had gone to private school before now. I would have never hung out with a private school kid before. We talked all the way home, and I carried his books. He turned out to be a pretty cool kid. I asked him if he wanted to play football on Saturday with me and my friends. He said yes.

We hung out all weekend and the more I got to know him, the more I liked him. My friends thought the same.

Monday morning came, and there was Kyle with the huge stack of books. I stopped him and said,

For a type you are, you're going to build some serious muscles with this pile of books everyday!

He just laughed and handed me half the books.

Over the next 3 years, Kyle and I became best friends. When we were seniors, we began to think in high school, Kyle decided to go to high school general, and I was thinking Handel. I knew we would always be friends, and the miles would never be a problem. He wanted to be a doctor, and I thought the business and to concentrate on football. Kyle was valedictorian of our class. I teased him that he was a nerd.

He had to prepare a speech for graduation. I was so glad it was not me having to get up and speak.

On graduation day, I saw Kyle, he looked great.

He was one of those guys that really found himself during high school. He filled out and actually looked good in glasses. He had more girls than me, and the girls loved him. Uh! Sometimes I was jealous.

Today was one of those days. I could see he was nervous in connection with the speech he was holding. So I gave him a pat on the shoulder and said, "Hey, big guy, this is great!"

He looked at me with one of those looks (the really grateful one) and smiled, "Thanks!" he said.

When he started his speech, he cleared his throat, and began ...

- "Graduation is a time to thank those who helped you through those tough years. Your parents, your teachers, your siblings, maybe a coach, but most of all .... Your friends. I'm here to tell you that to be a friend to someone is the greatest gift you can give them. I'll tell you a story ...."

I looked at my friend with disbelief as he told the story of the first day we met.

He had planned to kill himself over the weekend. He talked of how he had cleaned out his locker at school, so her mother would not have to do it later and was carrying his stuff home. He looked directly at me and gave me a small smile. - "Fortunately, and in gratitude, I was saved. My friend saved me from doing the unspeakable ..."

I heard the gasp go through the crowd as this handsome, popular boy told us all about his weakest moment.

I saw his father and mother looked at me with that same grateful smile. Not until that moment did I realize its depth.

Never underestimate the power of your actions. - "With one small gesture you can change a person's life. For better or worse. We are all given to influence each other in some way. Look for the good in others!"

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

The house at the beach, had a lot of big windows.
Inside that house, lived love and death!
It was wonderful watching the waves every now and then. Sometimes in the evenings, they used to sit on the beach, playing cards. Some other times, they just sat there, and ejnoyed the ocean. The ocean can cure- they heard.
To them, the ocean gave love. You should`ve seen that kind of love. That kind of love, when you do not want the other person any more, but the one, where you want what`s best for the other one. You know the "one in a million" kind of love.
But, death was near by. It did sneak somehow. Yea. Like it always does.
I have seen that look in those eyes. I have seen that pain through those tears. I was there. That`s how i learned what love is. That`s where i have seen real love!

They fighted death. They did everything they could. I gotta tell you, they lost the battle...

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

Tonight, the subject is death!
You might say; Again?
Well, it is a part of us. It is the only thing that is certain.
What makes me think so much of death?- you might be wondering.
Well, everytime it comes around sneaking and takes someone away from us.
Someone we know, or someone we don`t.
Some genius or just a poor neighbour.
Some child out there somewhere, or someone i met on a internet.
Someone of my people or many people from a bomb explosion,
Noe i`ve said that i`m used to death now. I`ve seen the face of death so many times.

I would like to share one experience with you.

At work, this man came in. He rode to the hospital.
After a day of examination , the doctor came in, and told him;
You have got this awful disease. There is no healing. So what we are gonna do with you, is that we are gonna stop giving you anything at all, beacuse you are not going to get well. Now, it is only going one way. You are going to die tomorow.
I`ll never forget the look on this man`s face. He swallowed once, closed his eyes, and whispered; it`s ok.

I couldn`believe my own ears. I ran out, went to the toilet, and i cried like a child.

They stopped giving him anything. Even food.
Later on that day, i asked him if he was hungry. Yes - he replayed.
I took a bowl of soup and a glass of juise, I sat next to his bed and fed him.

We talked about life. I never mentioned once the death. I asked him a lot of question. The one with happy answeres. I wanted him to remember only his good and happy times.
When we were done, and before i left, i asked him; How are you doing?
He looked at me for a while and said; I am good when you are here!

The look on his face while saying that, i will never forget that either!

Next time i went to job, he was gone..

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

I missed you tonight. That made me wanna see your pictures.
So that`s exactly what i did.
You look so alive, darling. All those times, we spent together, comes and goes life a flash before my eyes. I remembered when you just sat there, stared at me, and said nothing at all.. I now know that that`s when you said most..

You left really early, leaving this huge emptyness behind you.
What do i do with that?
They say; time heals. I am not so sure about that.
Life goes on. We keep doing everything, just like before, but this empty feeling in this empty room, is eating my heart up, from inside.


Just wanted to let you know, you are being missed.


[YOUTUBE]yNeZ-1ExZdQ[/YOUTUBE]

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

[FONT="Garamond"][SIZE="3"][B]See me through my mum`s eyes![/B]

My mum told me that I'm the best gift she`s got in her life. She has also said that every time she wakes up in the morning, I'm the first thing that comes to her mind and then she gets happy in her heart and feel very lucky because she has me. There's plenty more she has said but I will not say it all because it takes many many pages .. And every time she says things like that to me I get sooo happy and smiles a big smile.

I'm only 6 years old and I am in first grade. I am fortunate to have a teacher that I like and think she is really good. We are a lot of 6-7 year olds in our class. We're very different, but most of us are very curious and ask a whole lot. Sometimes we forget to raise our hand as well. At times we may be troubled. I am aware that it can sometimes be a bit too much for our teacher. Just because she can not respond to 15 six-year-olds at the same time.

Because of that, I will gladly help you to help us so we all have a good day.

-As I said many times now, I'm 6 years. I like attention and it does not hurt with a whole lot of love either! I need it. That is also a need No. 3 on the pyramid Maslow made the long, long time ago.

- And love , i find it in a lot of things, but most of all in the way you talk to me. I can not explain exactly how, but I notice it. I find love in the way you come to me and help me when i need your help. When you caress my hair, my hand or my back. When you take the time to talk with me about things that are not important to you at all but you do it for my sake. Now, I know we are many children, you have a job to do and you can not do all these things with me all day, but once in a while. It does not take long and it makes me feel I am being seen and heard. I like it when adults say something nice to me. Imagine if all adults had thought about it and said something nice to us every day, then I think we had lived on it all day. It doesn`t need to be much, but such small things as: how nice your hair looks today, cool sweater you had, so good you were at this and that .., it takes what? 4 seconds to say it to each of us, and together let's say it takes 4-5 minutes a day. But it enhances everything we do throughout the day.

I have heard the adults say, It's much better to prevent than to cure.

- It also happens that I do things I should not, things that are not so nice to do, even stupid things. Sometimes I do it just for fun, I think it's fun because some of my friends laugh at it and then I think, they liked it, they'll like me and they are going to want to play with me even more if I'm doing even crazier things, and so it happens that someone gets hurt because of what I have done. Then I being approached. Perhaps it would have been a good idea that they were trying to find out first what the real reason was for what happened, also work with it instead of being angry and "attack" me. Because sometimes I think just to play and it happens accidentally. Do not think that I want others to get hurt because of me. I would never hurt anyone intentionally. On the contrary, I like to help others. I also like it when the adults ask me to do things because then I know they have confidence in me. We are learning to be confident in ourselves, so things can also happen if there are such situations where I do not know quite what to do. (Uncertainty, insecurity).

It would also be nice if they were a little more patient with me because I can not quite put into words everything. When they ask "why" , I do not know quite what to say and I have to say anything since they ask so many times, and then it's easy to say "because". Then, you know, they become a little irritated. That is when i feel that the whole world is against me, I feel like I just do stupid things, that I am mean.

I feel I must since everyone around me expects it .. ("Children lives up to expectations"). I become sad if I get "shut up" in front of my friends. They use it against me later on and I get blamed for everything. Even when I'm not to the place at all. It makes me feel pain inside me.

-I am trying to learn to think about the consequences of what I do before I do it, but sometimes I forget it. And when that happens I would like you to remind me of it, in a friendly way. That is when it enters, othervise when adults are "attacking" me, then I feel that they do not understand me, and it is so easy for me to take on the sassy-cool mask. That's when the alarm turns on inside my head and then I hear nothing of what they say. So it does not help me much. Sometimes you know when there are small things, so it is perhaps a little idea to try to ignore it. Collusion is not so stupid maybe, like eks. if I get very restless in class, we can have an agreement that I go out and run a lap around the school so that I get to use some of my energy, because you know I have a lot of energy and I would like to use it properly way, but then I need the help of adults, in that way it is not beyond all others around me.

-Please, I am learning in this world, think of it, I can a loooot less than a drop. ("What we know is just a drop, what we don` t is an ocean, "Isaac Newton.)

-I am sure you know all this, I will just remind you of it, exactly the same way how I need to be reminded of things every time it needed, until one day when I will be a big boy and be proud of all who have taught me, among others my first teacher.

[B]"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around."[/B] Leo Buscaglia.[/SIZE][/FONT]

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

Nice and funny?

Wouldn`t call it only that anylonger, but.. Ok.

Is it the drinking? Dancing? The music? Fun?
I`m having contact with those amazing feelings..
I think i better be back, so i don`t say anything i shouldn`t. ;D

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

While his wife is out,a man decides to paint their wooden toilet seat.The wife comes home earlier than he expected,runs in for a pee and gets the toilet seat stuck to her arse.She's really pissed off and demands her husband drive her to the doctors.
She steps out of her knickers and puts on a large overcoat to cover the seat and when they get to the doctors,the husband lifts the back of the coat,shows him his wife's arse and says to the doctor, "Have you ever seen anything like this?"
"Well,yes I have."replies the doctor."But not framed!"

Nuk eshte Nice as funny por eshte keshilldhenese !
 

[I]A TRUE STORY AND CONSIDER THIS IN THE UPCOMING NEW YEAR!

I went to the party and remembered what you said. You asked me not to drink alcohol. So I drank a Sprite. I felt proud of myself, as you said I should feel. You said I should not drink and drive, contrary to what some friends told me. I made a healthy choice and your advice was correct, as all you give me forever.

When the party finally ended, people began to drive without being able to do so. I went to my car with the certainty that he would return home in peace. I never imagined what awaited me, Mom. Now I'm lying in the street and I hear the policeman say: "The kid that caused this accident was drunk." Mom, his voice seems so distant. My blood is spilled everywhere and I'm trying with all my might not moan. I can hear the doctors say, "This girl is going to die." I have the certainty that the young man, who ran at full speed, decided to drink and drive, and now I have to die.

Why do people do this, Mom, knowing that this is going to ruin many lives? The pain is cutting me like a hundred knives. Tell my sister not to cry, tell Daddy to be strong. And when I go to heaven, I'll be watching for you all. Someone should have taught that boy is wrong to drink and drive. Maybe if his parents would have said, I would not be dying now. My breath is getting weaker, more and more. Mom, these are my last moments and I feel so desperate. I wish I could hug Mom, while I'm lying here dying. I wish I could tell you how much I love you, Mom. So .. I love ... y. .. goodbye ... "[/I]


(These words were written by a reporter who witnessed the accident).

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

[I]Husband walks in and sees his wife watching a cooking show and says "why are you watching that? You can't cook!"
She replies "Well you watch porn, don't you?!"[/I] :tongue::biggrin:

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

In 1986, Peter Davies was on holiday in Kenya after graduating from Northwestern University .. On a hike through the bush, he came across a young bull elephant standing with one leg raised in the air. The elephant seemed distressed, so Peter approached it very carefully. He got down on one knee, inspected the elephants foot, and found a large piece of wood deeply embedded in it.

As carefully and as gently as he could, Peter worked the wood out with his knife, after which the elephant gingerly put down its foot.

The elephant turned to face the man, and with a rather curious look on its face, stared at him for several tense moments. Peter stood frozen, thinking of nothing else but being trampled.
Eventually the elephant trumpeted loudly, turned, and walked away.
Peter never forgot that elephant or the events of that day.

Twenty years later, Peter was walking through the Chicago Zoo with his teenaged son. As they approached the elephant enclosure, one of the creatures turned and walked over to near where Peter and his son Cameron were standing.

The large bull elephant stared at Peter, lifted its front foot off the ground, then put it down. The elephant did that several times then trumpeted loudly, all the while staring at the man.

Remembering the encounter in 1986, Peter could not help wondering if this was the same elephant. Peter summoned up his courage, climbed over the railing, and made his way into the enclosure. He walked right up to the elephant and stared back in wonder. The elephant trumpeted again, wrapped its trunk around one of Peter legs and slammed him against the railing, killing him instantly.

Probably wasn't the same elephant.

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

Dear Wife, I’m writing you this letter to tell you that I’m leaving you forever. I’ve been a good man to you for 7 years & I have nothing to show for it. These last 2 weeks have been hell. ... Your boss called to tell me that you quit your job today & that was the last straw. Last week, you came home & didn’t even notice I had a new haircut, had cooked your favorite meal & even wore a brand new pair of silk boxers. You ate in 2 minutes, & went straight to sleep after watching all of your soaps. You don’t tell me you love me anymore; you don’t want sex or anything that connects us as husband & wife. Either you’re cheating on me or you don’t love me anymore; whatever the case, I’m gone. Your EX-Husband P.S. don’t try to find me. Your SISTER & I are moving away to West Virginia together! Have a great life!


Dear Ex-Husband Nothing has made my day more than receiving your letter. It’s true you & I have been married for 7 years, although a good man is a far cry from what you’ve been. I watch my soaps so much because they drown out your constant whining & griping Too bad that doesn’t work. I DID notice when you got a hair cut last week, but the 1st thing that came to mind was ‘You look just like a girl!’ Since my mother raised me not to say anything if you can’t say something nice, I didn’t comment. And when you cooked my favorite meal, you must have gotten me confused with MY SISTER, because I stopped eating pork 7 years ago. About those new silk boxers: I turned away from you because the $49.99 price tag was still on them, & I prayed it was a coincidence that my sister had just borrowed $50 from me that morning. After all of this, I still loved you & felt we could work it out. So when I hit the lotto for 10 million dollars, I quit my job & bought us 2 tickets to Jamaica But when I got home you were gone.. Everything happens for a reason, I guess. I hope you have the fulfilling life you always wanted. My lawyer said that the letter you wrote ensures you won’t get a dime from me. So take care. Signed, Your Ex-Wife, Rich As Hell & Free! P.S. I don’t know if I ever told you this, but my sister Carla was born Carl. I hope that’s not a problem

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money decided to hire herself out as a handy-woman and started canvassing her neighbour-hood.

She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had
any odd jobs for her to do.

"Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch," he said. "How much will you charge me?"

The blonde quickly responded, "How about £50?"

The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would need was in the garage.

The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, "Does she realize that our porch goes all the way around the house?"

He responded, "That's a bit cynical, isn't it?"

The wife replied, "You're right. I guess I'm starting to believe all those dumb blonde jokes ."

A short time later, the blonde handy-woman came to the door to collect her money. "You finished already?" the husband asked.

"Yes," the blonde replied, "and I had paint leftover, so I gave it two coats - no extra charge."

Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the £50 and handed it to her.

"And by the way," the blonde added ...........
"it's not a Porch -- it's an Audi.!!!


Joke :biggrin:

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

Let us talk.

I know, a single word says nothing at all
but a single word, can say everything.
Still, let`s talk!
About life`s biggest question
about the rain on your face
about unimportant stones
about your wings in my eyes.

Stop!
Let`s light up another cigarette..

Re: Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

[QUOTE=Bona-us;2248137]A blonde, wanting to earn some extra money decided to hire herself out as a handy-woman and started canvassing her neighbour-hood.

She went to the front door of the first house and asked the owner if he had
any odd jobs for her to do.

"Well, I guess I could use somebody to paint my porch," he said. "How much will you charge me?"

The blonde quickly responded, "How about £50?"

The man agreed and told her that the paint and everything she would need was in the garage.

The man's wife, hearing the conversation, said to her husband, "Does she realize that our porch goes all the way around the house?"

He responded, "That's a bit cynical, isn't it?"

The wife replied, "You're right. I guess I'm starting to believe all those dumb blonde jokes ."

A short time later, the blonde handy-woman came to the door to collect her money. "You finished already?" the husband asked.

"Yes," the blonde replied, "and I had paint leftover, so I gave it two coats - no extra charge."

Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the £50 and handed it to her.

"And by the way," the blonde added ...........
"it's not a Porch -- it's an Audi.!!!


Joke :biggrin:[/QUOTE]



:biggrin::biggrin::biggrin:

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

Great minds fuck each-other ¡¡

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

On January 9th, a group of bikers were riding west on I-74 when they saw a girl about to jump off the Murray Baker Bridge . So they stopped.



George, their leader, a big burly man of 53, got off his Harley, walked through a group of gawkers, past the State Trooper, and said, "What are you doing?"


She said, "I'm going to commit suicide."

While he didn't want to appear "sensitive," he didn't want to miss a be-a-legend opportunity either so he asked "Well, before you jump, why don't you give me a kiss?"
So, with no hesitation at all, she leaned back over the railing and did just that. It was a long, deep, lingering kiss followed immediately by another one.
After they finished, George got approval from his biker-buddies, and the onlookers and said to her, "Wow! That was the best kiss I have ever had honey! That's a real talent you're wasting. You could be famous if you rode with me. Why are you committing suicide?"
"My parents don't like me dressing up like a girl."
It's unclear whether she jumped or was pushed.

Re: Nice and funny stories....
 

Wrong email address:

A couple going on vacation but his wife was on a business trip so he went to the destination first and his wife would meet him the next day.

When he reached his hotel, he decided to send his wife a quick email.

Unfortunately, when typing her address, he mistyped a letter and his note was directed instead to an elderly preacher’s wife whose husband had passed away only the day before.

When the grieving widow checked her email, she took one look at the monitor, let out a piercing scream, and fell to the floor in a dead faint.

At the sound, her family rushed into the room and saw this note on the screen:

Dearest Wife,
Just got checked in. Everything prepared for your arrival tomorrow.

P.S. Sure is hot down here.

Titulli: Nice and funny stories....
 

I WISH YOU ENOUGH.

Recently, I overheard a mother and daughter in their last moments together at the airport as the daughter's departure had been announced. Standing near the security gate, they hugged and the mother said:

"I love you and I wish you enough."
...
The daughter replied, "Mom, our life together has been more than enough. Your love is all I ever needed. I wish you enough, too, Mom." They kissed and the daughter left.

The mother walked over to the window where I sat. Standing there, I could see she wanted and needed to cry.

I tried not to intrude on her privacy but she welcomed me in by asking, "Did you ever say good-bye to someone knowing it would be forever?" "Yes, I have," I replied. "Forgive me for asking but why is this a forever good-bye?"

"I am old and she lives so far away. I have challenges ahead and the reality is the next trip back will be for my funeral," she said.

When you were saying good-bye, I heard you say, "I wish you enough." May I ask what that means?"

She began to smile. "That's a wish that has been handed down from other generations. My parents used to say it to everyone." She paused a moment and looked up as if trying to remember it in detail and she smiled even more.

"When we said 'I wish you enough' we were wanting the other person to have a life filled with just enough good things to sustain them". Then turning toward me, she shared the following, reciting it from memory,

"I wish you enough sun to keep your attitude bright.

I wish you enough rain to appreciate the sun more.

I wish you enough happiness to keep your spirit alive.

I wish you enough pain so that the smallest joys in life appear much bigger.

I wish you enough gain to satisfy your wanting.

I wish you enough loss to appreciate all that you possess.

I wish you enough hellos to get you through the final good-bye."

She then began to cry and walked away.



- Author Unknown